(Abner has just woken Arnold up by licking his face, which tickles him.)
- Abner, stop it! Oh, Abner, you're such a pig!
Arnold (to Abner at night)
- Y’know boy, you’re more fun than a hundred dogs put together.
Arnold (on Abner)
- Must be getting a drink out of the toilet again.
Grandma (the morning after Abner goes missing)
- Anyone for bacon?
Arnold (describing Abner to the dog catcher)
- And his tail is so curly when you pull it out it goes 'spoing'!
Gerald (on the missing pig)
- Well, did you try going down to the dump and yelling 'sooey'?
Pig Skins R Us crew (yelling at Abner)
- Come back here, you football.
- 'Brilliant' does pretty much describe me. (He falls off chair.)
Gerald (on Arnold's brilliant idea)
- Well, it's not working, and it's making me sick.
Ernie (overwhelmed at the end)
- It does kinda bring a tear to your eye.
- That's just the onions.