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Grandpa

A grade school diploma. The one thing I've always wanted but never got.

Arnold

Couldn't you go back to school?

Grandpa

Oh-ho, I can't do that, Arnold. I'm too old. I've lost too many brain cells to make it through grade school.

Arnold

You're not too old, Grandpa. And you've still got plenty of brain cells.

Grandpa

No, not since Woodstock.

Principal Wartz (to a tough Grandpa Phil)

That does it this is your final warning either you straighten up if I'm right or I'll be forced to dismiss you from P.S. 118 report to detention after the final bell.

Phil

Report this, Wartz! (pulls the fire alarm and walks off)

Principal Wartz (resets the alarm)

That's it! I'm calling his parents!

Grandpa Phil

I'm gonna run for President. Pookie, you can be my campaign manager. What's our slogan?

Pookie

Melts in your mouth, not in your hand.

Grandpa Phil

Pookie, you're fired. Arnold! You can be my campaign manager.

'Arnold (Sighs)

Grandpa...

Grandpa Phil

I want that diploma!

Arnold

Let's get it!

Grandpa Phil

Right after my nap!

Phil
(to Wolfgang) How about you let me kick, young fella?
Wolfgang
(laughing) Aren't you afraid you're gonna fall down and break your hip?
Phil
(angrily) My hip is made of rock hard plastic!  Watch this! (kicks the ball hard breaking a window, everyone runs off)
Wolfgang
Awesome kick, old guy!  What's your name?
Phil
Phil.
Wolfgang
Come on, Phil.  Sit with us at lunch, okay?